Do you have a Zombie Plan?
January 30, 2024
***Opinion***
Are you prepared for an emergency? You are not! Ok you foolish person, listen up! It is always good to have a plan or plans for many common emergencies. Considering all the crazy types of emergencies that have happened since 2019 it would be wise to plan for even the craziest emergencies. An example was the toilet paper sold out from stores in 2020 and the super killer cough (now known to just be a sniffle)! What about an emergency involving hordes of the living undead? Well get planning so you know what to do! Remember after the planning stage you should practice the emergency plan so you and your loved ones know what to do.
Let us look at a list of basic supplies needed:
Backpack
Copy of emergency plan
Whistle
Clothes and good footwear
Water
Food
Brown bread (bread in a can! Also can be used as a weapon)
Oatmeal
Trail mix
Cooking stove and fuel
Medicine and medical supplies (Ibuprofen
Duct tape (a must)
Phone, charger, power bank, batteries
Cash
Pen and notepad
Anti-Zombie helmet (have to protect that brain of yours)
Weapons (*optional for normal emergencies but a requirement for the undead)
Gun
Sword or machete
Baseball bat
Gold brick (or to trade)
Windex (to clean up the blood stains)
Below are a few of my plans for when the undead hordes arise to take over the planet from the fat lazy humans that currently occupy it. You just have to outrun the chubbier person behind you! Take and use some of the ideas in your own Zombie plan.
What are your Zombie Plans?
- Grab a bug out bag (emergency supply bag) and run for my life.
- Get a vehicle then drive to Vermont to hide out in a cabin in the woods. (Movies say Vermont is safe)
- Get a vehicle then drive to up state New York to live off the land.
- Drive to Alaska because zombies freeze in the cold.
- Drive to Alaska find an oil well then set up a small community around it.
- Start killing every zombie I can find using any type of weapons I can find or create.
- Knowingly infect myself with the zombie virus to bite my family, we can be happy a zombie family!
What are your plans?
Happy planning!
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